Life has a beautiful way of teaching you lessons. You can spend your whole life thinking that you want something only to find out later that you want the exact opposite.
This morning I logged on to Facebook to see two announcements of engagement. One, a picture showcasing a gorgeous ring and the other of a friend from home that brought me to tears as I watched him declare is love for his now fiancée in front of their friends and family. It's no secret that I want to be married and have a family. I know that I was built to be a great wife and the coolest mom ever but as I sit and watch people I know embark on new journeys day to day on social media I can't help but wonder why not me? Why haven't I arrived yet? I know I deserve all that I dream of but why hasn't it happened yet?
This is a conversation I've had with my close friends and I think I've found the answer. We all want what we want but life is about timing. I remember my senior year of college I planned on moving to NYC within a year of graduation. My work was wrapping up and all I could see on the other side was my modeling career. Looking in hindsight it is apparent that if that happened I would've crashed and burned. Outside of the fact that this great city is a beast, there were things I needed to go through, people I needed to meet, lives that I needed to touch prior to my arrival in the Big Apple. If I had embarked on this journey prematurely I know that I'd be in a completely different place in life.
Despite my ticking biological clock that family and friends remind me of when they ask "So are you next?", "When are you going to have some children... you know you aren't getting any younger!" oh and of course the "No man wants a woman who is too busy." I feel really good about my situation. What these people can't seeing is that I'm building an empire here. Not only do I want to give my children the things I never had I also want to make sure I give them ME. I want to my husband to feel like he has my time and knows that I am present. Of course with the industry I am in it will require me to be pulled in directions the average person isn't but hey so what? If my best is given and my future family is taken care of I'm good. I may want the big house, great relationship and a fish (I'm working on becoming a dog person lol) but is my timing correct? I can't imagine lugging a stroller on the subway as I go to castings or trying to find a babysitter everytime I get called away. Let's not forget about these student loans that are running my life!
I say all of this to say... it's okay. It's okay to be non-traditional. It's okay to be the odd ball. As long as your making strides in the right direction and doing all the things you need to line yourself up with your future plans YOU'RE GOOD. Have a blessed one.
A Twenty Something Woman With No Children, No Husband and is Just Fine With All That.